The 1st Annual Pickled Priest Fantasy Music Draft
- Pickled Priest
- Sep 13
- 39 min read
In honor of the start of the NFL season and the subsequent avalanche of fantasy football talk that is going to dominate water cooler conversations everywhere you go until mid-January, we have decided to create our own Fantasy Music Draft. Same concept, but with musical artists in lieu of injury-prone football players. We've posted the results of our inaugural Pickled Priest Fantasy Music Draft below for your "amusement" and analysis. We'll add commentary after each round and rank the performance of each participant at the end. The players are ready, so let's get into it.
THE DETAILS
1) 10 participants select in a "snake" draft order (10th pick of first round also gets 11th pick and so on). Draft order randomized.
2) Each participant will pick 16 "players" from the prescribed categories listed below:
One artist from the 1950s
Three artists from the 1960s
Three artists from the 1970s
Three artists from the 1980s
Three artists from the 1990s
Two artists from the 21st century (listed as the 2000s)
Flex: One 'Wild Card' from any decade (in last round)
3) Participants can pick from any decade at any time, but may not exceed the artist limit for each decade.
4) Since many artists span more than one decade, the decade of the artist's most known or substantial work will be the default (Dylan goes into the 60s; Elvis the 50s; Pink Floyd the 70s, etc.). Disputes over decade assignment will be settled by a majority vote of the other nine drafters. The Priest himself will act as commissioner and intervene in all conflicts or if players seem to be colluding to saddle another drafter with an inferior decade for their selected artist (solo Paul McCartney in the 80s rather than the 70s, for example) or if any other malfeasance is detected.
5) Since great art isn't quantifiable by sales, popularity, or other statistics, the Priest will determine the order of finish at the end of the draft based on several arbitrary criteria: quality of artists chosen, diversity of genres chosen, draft strategy, value picks, personal whims, and other intangibles to be delineated in the Priest's post-draft analysis.
6) Any genre but jazz and classical are in scope (to make it easier on the Drafters).
7) Drafting a band, Cream for example, does not include any solo work later released by any member. If you want Clapton solo (not recommended), he has to be drafted separately.
8) Remember: You're not necessarily trying to build a team of your personal favorites, nor are you trying to impress us with your deep, obscure knowledge of music...you're trying to build a power team. You're trying to win!
PARTICIPANT BIOS
(In draft order, real names changed to protect the inept)
#1: Greg - Self-professed classic rocker; dabbles in new music, mostly rock-related genres
#2: Ann - Prides herself on remaining current on all kinds of new music, but grew up on Americana
#3: Lisa - Keeps Sirius/XM locked on 80's station 85% of the time; 15% new pop and other random finds
#4: Greil - Record store owner; leans experimental; leans ornery
#5: Quest - Lover of soul, rap/hip-hop, funk, and R&B; old, new, it's all good (not that Quest, for the record)
#6: Eric - Semi-fanatical about certain genres (alternative, garage rock, classic rock); has trouble keeping up with new music due to his "busy" schedule.
#7: Lester - Eclectic record collection, tons of music knowledge, leans punk, gravitates anywhere, anytime #8: Amanda - Music writer; taste is all over the place, highly unpredictable #9: Ira - Alternative-rock focused with the occasional pop song mixed in; published author
#10: Doug - Doobie Brothers tribute band singer (The Dougie Brothers, if you must know); eclectic taste
Without further explanation, let's get started...
THE PICKLED PRIEST 1st ANNUAL MUSIC DRAFT
ROUND ONE
Pickled Priest: Welcome to the inaugural Pickled Priest Music Draft! I assume all have read the rules. So let's begin. Greg, you're officially on the clock.
#1: Greg (1)
THE BEATLES (60s, 1 of 3)
Greg: Draft over. I win. [Total process took approximately three seconds]
#2: Ann (2)
BOB DYLAN (60s, 1 of 3)
Ann: Not so fast, Greggy boy, the greatest songwriter in history is off the board.
#3: Lisa (3)
THE ROLLING STONES (60s, 1 of 3)
Lisa: Greg, the Beatles could be the best band ever, and Ann, Dylan's the best songwriter, but the Stones are the World's Greatest Rock & Roll Band and nobody can tell me otherwise.
#4: Greil (4)
PRINCE (80s, 1 of 3)
Greil: Positively predictable so far, so let's start in the 80s instead. Easily the most important artist of his era. I'm taking him while he's still on the board.
#5: Quest (5)
STEVIE WONDER (70s, 1 of 3)
Quest: Greil, you've gotta pay homage to the greatest musician of the 70s before you rush blindly into the 80s looking for purple gold.
Ann: Blind pun intended, I hope.
#6: Eric (6)
LED ZEPPELIN (70s, 1 of 3)
Eric: Their first two albums were from the 60s, yes, but all others, including the almighty Zep IV & Physical Graffiti et al, are from the 70s.* Can't believe they're still here for me at #6!
Pickled Priest: A group vote confirmed (by a 6 to 3 margin) the that the 70s is an allowable decade classification based on the preponderance of the evidence, but the 1960s would've also been accepted.
#7: Lester (7)
THE VELVET UNDERGROUND (60s, 1 of 3)
Lester: All of alternative rock starts here. Bow down to innovation, originality, and influence.
#8: Amanda (8)
THE WHO (60s, 1 of 3)
Amanda: Maximum R&B people, Maximum R&B, people! [Announced while making windmill motion with right arm, subsequently scattering a bowl of nearby corn chips onto the floor.]
Ira: Clean up pause requested.
Pickled Priest: Granted.
#9: Ira (9)
THE JIMI HENDRIX EXPERIENCE (60s, 1 of 3)
Ira: Look what I found? The Ja'Marr Chase of guitarists late in Round One! A coup for Team Ira! Am I experienced? You're damn fucking right I am!
#10: Doug (10)
ELVIS PRESLEY (50s, 1 of 1)
Doug: I'm about to blow your minds on the endcap, so pay attention. With the 10th pick of the 2025 Pickled Priest Music Draft, Doug selects Elvis Presley, the King of Rock & Roll. By far, the #1 artist of the 50s and likely the entire draft in extension.
Lester: This is shaping up to be a long night of chest pounding.
PRIEST COMMENTARY
About as exciting and predictable as the first round of any sports draft where the elite players get snagged first, with only a couple of unexpected twists. The Velvets pick I don't begrudge, but I am a little surprised it was used at #7. Probably would've slipped well into Round 2. A pleasant surprise, but will it pay off in the long run?
Value Pick of Round 1: Elvis in the #10 slot. Certainly not befitting a King!
____________________
ROUND TWO
#10: Doug (11)
NIRVANA (90s, 1 of 3)
Doug: With the 11th pick of the 2025 Pickled Priest Music Draft, Doug selects Nirvana, by far the #1 band of the 90s. Two picks, two decade-toppers. Try to keep up, people. Try to keep up.
[Group eye roll]
#9: Ira (12)
ARETHA FRANKLIN (60s, 2 of 3)
Ira: Like taking candy from a baby, baby, sweet baby, the greatest singer of all-time, Aretha Franklin, joins our ranks alongside the greatest guitarist of all-time. She wouldn't let the boys in Nirvana cut her lawn, let alone outrank her.
#8: Amanda (13)
OTIS REDDING (60s, 2 of 3)
Amanda: Great pick, you sweet bastard. I wanted her! Not to be outdone, I follow the Queen of Soul with the King of Soul, the Big O, the pride of Macon, Georgia, sitter on docks, the man who wrote the book, literally, on "Respect," Otis Ray Redding Jr.!
#7: Lester (14)
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN & THE E STREET BAND (70s, 1 of 3)
Lester: Nobody drafted so far has been on the cover of Time and Newsweek in the same week! Nobody has performed a four-hour concert. Nobody has earned more respect through his words, music, and actions than the Mayor of E Street, Bruce Springsteen.
#6: Eric (15)
PINK FLOYD (70s, 2 of 3)
Eric: The person who wins the 70s in this draft likely wins the whole damn thing, in my humble opinion. The only decade that really matters. Led Zep/Pink Floyd, the ultimate double-bill.
Pickled Priest: A group vote was not required this time with most understanding that, despite a run of records in the 60s, Floyd peaked in the 70s in more ways than one.
#5: Quest (16)
MICHAEL JACKSON (80s, 1 of 3)
Quest: Greil, you forgot about Michael when you claimed Prince as the most important artist of the 80s. I patiently await your retraction. Ladies and gentlemen, Michael Jackson!
Greil: Ladies and gentlemen, may I present your 11 year-old son, in bed, buck naked, with the most important artist of the 80s! Yuck.
#4: Greil (17)
NEIL YOUNG (70s, 1 of 3)
Greil: I may have lost out on Dylan, but I am not going to lose out on Neil Young. Eight decades of integrity, restless ambition, and great music with no signs of letting up!
#3: Lisa (18)
DAVID BOWIE (70s, 1 of 3)
Lisa: Jagger and Bowie on Team Lisa! Frontman central station! Good luck putting on a better fantasy concert.
#2: Ann (19)
JOHNNY CASH (50s, 1 of 1)
Ann: No fantasy of mine would be complete without a Man in Black. Let's get some country on the board!
#1: Greg (20)
QUEEN (70s, 1 of 3)
Greg: Remember me? I picked like an hour ago? [Shakes everyone's hand]
Greg: [Mimics bugle reverie] It is my pleasure to introduce, their royal majesty, Queen, second in line to the first pick throne in my fantasy lineup. And... [continued below]
PRIEST COMMENTARY
With nary a drop in quality, Round 2 is an embarrassment of riches as you would expect with 70 years of popular music to pick from. When we set up this draft we assumed the major players would go first and the newer artists would fall later and we weren't wrong. It's the order that's most interesting. Nirvana is the undisputed 90s #1, but sandwiched between Elvis and Aretha, I bet even Kurt would shake his head in disbelief. With the depth of talent in the 70s, it's no surprise that the 60s came out guns blazing with all clamoring for the elite players.
Value Pick: Johnny Cash at #19 is inspired, a real coup for a group admittedly short on country love (not to be confused with Courtney Love).
____________________
ROUND THREE
#1: Greg (21)
THE CLASH (70s, 2 of 3)
Greg: ...with our next pick, on the top half of our London double-decker bus, is the only band that matters...
Ira: ...The Spice Girls! [laughter]
Greg: The Clash!
#2: Ann (22)
SAM COOKE (60s, 2 of 3)
Greil: Technically, he made his name in the 50s.
Ann: Three-times more hits in the 60s even though he was murdered in 1964. Case closed.
Pickled Priest: After the group vote, 60s authorized by a vote of 7-1 (Greil, of course, the only Nay vote; one abstention due to an extended bathroom visit).
#3: Lisa (23)
MADONNA (80s, 1 of 3)
Lisa: Finally, the 80s! Lace gloves and leggings in my purse, hold on! It's good to be back with the Queen of the 80s, Madonna! My queen.
Ann: It was only a matter of time.
#4: Greil (24)
BOB MARLEY (70s, 2 of 3)
Greil: I may have lost out on Bob Dylan, but I'm not losing out on Bob Marley. The man who changed his country and the world! [Said dramatically]
Ann: If I knew the pain I was going to cause by drafting Dylan before you, I'd do it all over again in a nanosecond. Exquisite.
#5: Quest (25)
JAMES BROWN (60s, 1 of 3)
Quest: If hard work deserves to be rewarded and we are truly now living in a meritocracy, Soul Brother #1, the undisputed Hardest Working Man in Show Business, James Brown, would've been the top pick in the whole draft. My team is going to own the Apollo after I'm done here.
Pickled Priest: No vote needed. 60s allowed by decree of the Priest [all nod in unison].
#6: Eric (26)
ELTON JOHN (70s, 3 of 3)
Eric: Elton owned the first half of the 70s and bought the second half with the royalties.
Pickled Priest: Eric, with just three rounds gone, you have just closed out the 1970s on your draft board.
Eric: Mission accomplished!
#7: Lester (27)
THE RAMONES (70s, 2 of 3)
Lester: Elton may have owned the first half of the 70s, but a new world order rented a cheap, rat-infested flat in Queens in the second half and its name was The Ramones. Hey ho, let's go!
#8: Amanda (28)
RAY CHARLES (50s, 1 of 1)
Amanda: I love a good punk rock band whose songs all sound the same as much as the next girl, but all of you have forgotten about a certified musical genius in your midst, and likely thee most naturally gifted musician of all-time, Ray Charles! And he did it all with two eyes tied behind his back [all nod in consensus].
#9: Ira (29)
R.E.M. (80s, 1 of 3)
Ira: The greatest American band ever? Look no further than the oft-derided 1980s for R.E.M.
Lisa: Who's deriding the 80s? Them's fightin' words!
Ira: Me, for one.
Lester: And me.
Amanda: And me.
Eric: And me.
Pickled Priest: Not me.
#10: Doug (30)
JONI MITCHELL (70s, 1 of 3)
Doug: With the 30th pick of the 2025 Pickled Priest Fantasy Music Draft, Greg selects Joni Mitchell. No explanation needed. Critically protected, like a wildlife preserve or historic building.
PRIEST COMMENTARY
The decade spread begins in Round 3 with the 50s, 60s, 70s, and 80s all represented. Biggest surprise: Marley at #24, which doesn't mean he isn't deserving. Also, punk enters the fold times two, a tribute to its lasting impact.
Value Pick: Ray Charles, genius defined, down at the 28th spot. The steal of the draft so far.
____________________
ROUND FOUR
#10: Doug (31)
TAYLOR SWIFT (2000s, 1 of 2)
Doug: This group of old bastards and bastardettes needs a shock to wake it up to the modern world and I'm just the guy to do it. With the 31st pick in the 2025 Pickled Priest Fantasy Draft, Doug selects Mrs. Travis Kelce!
Lisa: Name three of her songs right now.
Doug: She's merely a commodity to me, meant to be bought and sold like a corporate stock. I'm here to win, not make friendship bracelets.
#9: Ira (32)
THE BEACH BOYS (60s, 3 of 3)
Ira: I crushed the 60s, can everyone admit that at least?
Lester: You were in college during the 60s, so perhaps that had something to do with it.
#8: Amanda (33)
THE KINKS (60s, 3 of 3)
Amanda: I come out of the 60s with The Who, Otis Redding, and The Kinks. Speaking of crushing the 60s! And I wasn't even born yet!
#7: Lester (34)
THE GRATEFUL DEAD (60s, 2 of 3)
Lester: Any discussion of the greatest American bands must start and end with the Dead.
Amanda: Any discussion of hot-plate grilled cheeses and Ziploc bags full of shrooms must start with the Dead. The rest of your statement is questionable.
Pickled Priest: A vote of 9-0 allows the Dead into the 60s, although most of their finest work was done in the 70s, mainly due to their involvement in the heyday of San Francisco's Haight-Ashbury scene of the mid- to late-60s.
#6: Eric (35)
BUDDY HOLLY (50s, 1 of 1)
Eric: Shall we have a moment of silence for the late, great Buddy Holly? [Draft room obliges].
#5: Quest (36)
MARVIN GAYE (60s, 2 of 3)
Quest: With the exception of maybe Sam Cooke, no smoother voice has ever graced black vinyl.
Greg: Building quite the diverse team so far, I see.
#4: Greil (37)
CHUCK BERRY (50s, 1 of 1)
Greil: I'm putting an end to this nonsense right now. Without Chuck Berry, this draft doesn't exist.
#3: Lisa (38)
TOM PETTY & THE HEARTBREAKERS (70s, 2 of 3)
Lisa: I love that video where he plays the Mad Hatter! Co-written by Dave Stewart of the Eurythmics!
#2: Ann (39)
VAN MORRISON (70s, 1 of 3)
Ann: If he wasn't such a crabass, he would've gone much higher I bet. Still happy to have him over to my team dinner this weekend. Should be a lively table discussion.
Pickled Priest: Allowed in the 70s by papal edict. Would've allowed 60s as well if proposed due to presence of Astral Weeks, one of the all-time great albums. However, Moondance was 1970 and he was most popular and prolific in the 70s.
#1: Greg (40)
AC/DC (70s, 3 of 3)
Greg: How has everyone been? I haven't seen you in what, a couple years? You haven't aged a bit! With the volume turned up to 13, I'm selecting AC/DC!
Pickled Priest: Greg, you have now closed out the 70s on your draft board.
PRIEST COMMENTARY
You knew it had to happen. Taylor Swift, Inc. buys its way to the top of Round 4. It's a tribute to her dominance that her pick didn't cause a run on the store, that store being the 21st century. Not a peep to be heard since. I thought it would've at least scared up a Beyoncé pick from someone. Let the debate ring out if this was too big a reach this early or not. I'm thinking it was a couple rounds too soon at least.
Value Pick: Tom Petty at pick 38. Oh my my, oh hell yes.
____________________
ROUND FIVE
#1: Greg (41)
U2 (80s, 1 of 3)
Greg: With my next pick I'm taking the most impactful, important, and still intact band of the last 50 years, U2!
Ira: I thought you were going to say Toto.
#2: Ann (42)
RADIOHEAD (90s, 1 of 3)
Ann: The most adventurous new band of the 90s, Radiohead!
Greil: And the most boring old band of the 21st century!
#3: Lisa (43)
LITTLE RICHARD (50s, 1 of 1)
Lisa: While a founding father is still around, I'm going to grab him before it's too late! Shut up! Oooo-ooooh! [Little Richard imitation attempted with limited success]
#4: Greil (44)
CREEDENCE CLEARWATER REVIVAL (60s, 1 of 3)
Greil: If I can't have Bob Dylan, then I'll choose CCR, the best Southern rock band California ever produced and in the discussion for best American band ever if they'd only lasted more than 26 months!
#5: Quest (45)
FATS DOMINO (50s, 1 of 1)
Quest: I better address the 50s before it's too late. Like drafting the first quarterback in Fantasy Football, I suspect a run on the store is imminent. I better get mine before all the giants are gone.
#6: Eric (46)
THE DOORS (60s, 1 of 3)
Eric: I don't even like them that much, but I've ignored the 60s so far and I suspect I will pay for that come judgement day [glances at the Priest, who provides no reaction].
Amanda: Morrison was a tool and he played with his, too. Useless twit.
#7: Lester (47)
THE EVERLY BROTHERS (50s, 1 of 1)
Lester: My daddy taught me how to draft, what can I say?
[Nobody acknowledges reference.]
#8: Amanda (48)
RANDY NEWMAN (70s, 1 of 3)
Amanda: I left the 70s alone since there are so many to pick from, but my favorite remaining songwriter is still here waiting for me, so I'm going Randy Newman.
Doug: Taken by one of the "short people" no less. Impressive.
#9: Ira (49)
TALKING HEADS (70s, 1 of 3)
Ira: Like Amanda, I'm just now delving into the 70s. But I'm hitting the gas and skipping right to the end to pick up the boundlessly energetic and creative juggernaut, Talking Heads. [Sings] You may find yourself in the fifth round of a fantasy music draft, you may ask yourself 'How did they fall here?'
#10: Doug (50)
SIMON & GARFUNKEL (60s, 1 of 3)
Doug: With the 50th pick of the 2025 Pickled Priest Fantasy Music Draft, Doug selects...
Doug: [Disregarding comment]...Simon & Garfunkel!
Greil: [Heavy sigh]
PRIEST COMMENTARY
The first round to throw me for a loop. Including a series of overvalued selections in U2, Radiohead, and the Doors. We also had a bit of a "50's Panic" in Round 5 as the cream of the crop started evaporating in the heat and our "One-Off" strategy for the 50s has had the desired impact, making selections more high stakes. Hard to argue with the selections either. Will others follow suit or sit back now that several players have shot their wad? Stay tuned.
Value Pick: Talking Heads at #49. A bold move to the back-end of the fertile 70s.
____________________
ROUND SIX
#10: Doug (51)
SLY & THE FAMILY STONE (70s, 2 of 3)
Doug: With the 51st pick in the 2025 Pickled Priest Fantasy Music Draft, Doug selects Sly & the Family Stone.
Greil: I'm calling this out for a vote. Four albums in the 60s. C'mon.
Doug: But only a couple were good. Two classics in the 70s in There's a Riot Goin' On and Fresh.
Pickled Priest: [After heated 10-minute debate] The verdict is 5-4 in favor of allowing it under the "Endcap Principle"--an equal number of great albums in multiple decades, plus popularity jump-started by classic Greatest Hits compilation in 1970. A coin flip really.
#9: Ira (52)
PATTI SMITH (70s, 2 of 3)
Ira: This may cost me, but I'm staying in the late-70s for another CBGB staple. Every team needs a poet and Patti is my on-call resident.
Eric: Then why did I get abuse for drafting the Doors?
Amanda: Because he was a talentless hack, that's why.
#8: Amanda (53)
AL GREEN (70s, 2 of 3)
Amanda: The greatest soul singer of the 70s hands down and a reverend to boot. You get him for Saturday night and Sunday morning, too!
Lester: Brilliant choice with a positive locker room presence as well.
#7: Lester (54)
THE BYRDS (60s, 3 of 3)
Lester: I'm throwing a party in the 60s and you're all invited. BYOD.
#6: Eric (55)
JANIS JOPLIN (60s, 2 of 3)
Eric: [Having trouble making his selection within 2-minute time limit] Uh, I don't know. Janis Joplin, I guess. The 60s aren't my thing and I fear I'm doomed as a result.
Greil: [Condescendingly] You should've done some research kid!
#5: Quest (56)
PARLIAMENT/FUNKADELIC (70s, 2 of 3)
Quest: Two bands for the price of one! That counts, please tell me this counts!
Pickled Priest: It counts.
#4: Greil (57)
THE BAND (60s, 2 of 3)
Greil: If I can't have Dylan at least I can get close to him with the Band.
Lisa: Are you aware of your codependency issues? Help is available.
#3: Lisa (58)
THE PRETENDERS (80s, 2 of 3)
Lisa: Strong woman alert! Better than the boys.
#2: Ann (59)
DIANA ROSS & THE SUPREMES (60s, 3 of 3)
Ann: With and without Diana's name out front, the biggest Motown hitmakers of the 60s. Boom!
Pickled Priest: You have now closed out the 60s on your draft board.
#1: Greg (60)
IRON MAIDEN (80s, 2 of 3)
Greg: The quintessential 80's metal band. If you thought you had me figured out! Think again!
PRIEST COMMENTARY
Iron Maiden in the sixth round is a definite reach and he likely could've snagged them eight rounds later, but Greg likes to protect his favorites and his shout out to the metal community is appreciated. You can tell personal tastes are starting to enter the equation now with so many possible options available, which is inevitable. But could such an approach backfire? I have to think Janis Joplin would've slipped down a couple more rounds as well, so that could be a fatal tactical error on Eric's part, a fact he owns up to to his credit. Perhaps he's out of his league here? We'll find out soon enough.
Value Pick: Parliament/Funkadelic at #56. Adding a little fun into your team is never a bad idea.
____________________
ROUND SEVEN
#1: Greg (61)
BEYONCÉ (2000s, 1 of 2)
Greg: Now you see me, now you don't! [Hides behind hands] One minute I'm running for the hills, the next minute I'm putting a ring on it! This should get me genre diversity points out the ying-yang.
#2: Ann (62)
LYNYRD SKYNYRD (70s, 2 of 3)
Ann: Proud to put some real Southern rock on the board!
#3: Lisa (63)
THE POLICE (80s, 3 of 3)
Lisa: Heartbroken to be leaving the 80s after this pick, but overjoyed that my beloved Police are still on patrol in Round 7! Whew!
Pickled Priest: The 80s are now closed off on your draft board, Lisa. [Lisa lowers head]
#4: Greil (64)
LEONARD COHEN (60s, 3 of 3)
Greil: The bard of the Great White North.
Ann: Plus, in the deal you get young, horny Leo and old, horny Leo. The best of both worlds. Great pick; I wish I'd thought of it.
#5: Quest (65)
THE TEMPTATIONS (60s, 3 of 3)
Quest: Speaking of double plays, I get classic Temps and psych Temps all in one place.
#6: Eric (66)
THE STOOGES (60s, 3 of 3)
Eric: I've spent that last twenty-minutes doing some digging and thought this would be a good pick to get my credibility back.
Ira: Back?
Pickled Priest: By the grace of God, you have now closed out the 60s on your draft board.
#7: Lester (67)
ABBA (70s, 3 of 3)
Lester: Completing a trilogy never seen in captivity before, I follow up Springsteen and the Ramones with the ultimate 70's Swedish pop badasses, ABBA. I will take no grief from any of you.
Quest: No grief coming. A bold choice.
Pickled Priest: You have now closed out your 1970s draft board.
#8: Amanda (68)
BOB SEGER & THE SILVER BULLET BAND (70s, 3 of 3)
Amanda: By rule, I get his 60s stuff and the big 80's stuff, too. But the best Seger is 70's road warrior Seger, sweating it out every night and stopping at roadside diners post-show.
Pickled Priest: You have also closed out your 1970s draft board.
Amanda: This is when things will start to get real interesting.
#9: Ira (69)
ELVIS COSTELLO (70s, 3 of 3)
Ira: I am Ira, shunner of classic 70s rock!
Pickled Priest: The 70s are shutting down fast. Get 'em while they last.
#10: Doug (70)
THE WHITE STRIPES (2000s, 2 of 2)
Doug: With the 70th pick in the 2025 Pickled Priest Fantasy Music Draft, Doug selects, from Detroit, Michigan, Jack and his big sister Meg, the White Stripes! If I am not the most unpredictable and forward-thinking drafter here, who is?
Greil: Must you?
Pickled Priest: The first of you to lock down their 21st century draft board! And in annoying fashion, no less!
PRIEST COMMENTARY
Finally, the 2000s start getting represented, even before the 90s! Beyoncé is like banking capital, so that's a solid investment. Same for the White Stripes, the most exciting new band of their era. We also find our 80's lady, Lisa, happy as a clam embedded in her decade of choice. But not anymore. Does she have it in her from now on? Stay tuned.
Value Pick: Leonard Cohen at #64. It's a rich mine full of poetic gold and it extends for decades.
____________________
ROUND EIGHT
#10: Doug (71)
OASIS (90s, 2 of 3)
Doug: With the 71st pick in the 2025 Pickled Priest Fantasy Music Draft, Doug selects, from Manchester, England, now touring the world to packed football stadiums, Oasis!
Greg: The masses are asses.
Doug: Jealousy does not become you, sir.
#9: Ira (72)
PIXIES (80s, 2 of 3)
Ira: I'm like a gas leak. Before you realize it, you're doomed.
#8: Amanda (73)
THE REPLACEMENTS (80s, 1 of 3)
Amanda: Methodically planning your demise, Ira, I enter the 90s, leaving behind a trail of dead via my 50s, 60s, and 70s masterplan. Your weaknesses will reveal themselves in short order.
#7: Lester (74)
HÜSKER DÜ (80s, 1 of 3)
Lester: It appears Amanda is claiming a calculated strategy when in fact she's been mimicking my tactics shamelessly all night. Well, I do the same to you now with what I like to call "The Reverse Minneapolis" gambit.
Quest: Following from the front. That's just plain devious.
#6: Eric (75)
TUPAC SHAKUR (90s, 1 of 3)
Eric: I admittedly have lost my mojo and now I'm scrambling to catch up. Will I be invited back next year?
Pickled Priest: [No comment]
#5: Quest (76)
PUBLIC ENEMY (80s, 2 of 3)
Quest: It's time to teach you all a lesson in cultural and artistic impact.
#4: Greil (77)
THE SMITHS (80s, 2 of 3)
Greil: Leonard Cohen and The Smiths back-to-back, heaven knows I'm not miserable now!
Lester: Do you want me to tell you when you're trying too hard?
#3: Lisa (78)
EMINEM (90s, 1 of 3)
Lisa: The 90s are next door neighbors with the 80s, people, so watch out for Lisa. There's more to her than you realize!
#2: Ann (79)
BECK (90s, 2 of 3)
Ann: He's a Grammy winner, so he must not be a loser after all!
[Hysterical, mocking laughter from all, including Ann]
#1: Greg (80)
PEARL JAM (90s, 2 of 3)
Greg: [Pretending to wake from nap] What? My turn? Uh, Pearl Jam, I guess. [Mimics going back to sleep]
[Nonplussed reaction from all]
PRIEST COMMENTARY
It's a logical strategy to take care of the early decades first, so deep in the first half of the draft is where we start segueing into the 90s before it's too late. The decade began the fragmentation of music into numerous new sub-genres, but our group decided to read the rules and draft mainly big names early on in an attempt to create a bill that would sell out in 10-minutes or less. The Oasis pick had to be fueled by a current tour bias, with other big names from the decade following quickly. A run on some of the most significant bands of the 80s also is featured, all snubbed so far by the Hall of Fame. What a useless institution.
Value Pick: Ira nabbing the influential Pixies at #74.
____________________
ROUND NINE
#1: Greg (81)
GREEN DAY (90s, 2 of 3)
Greg: [Wakes again..] Right, right...two picks. I remember now. OK then, Green Day it is. Two HOFers in a row and I'm barely awake!
#2: Ann (82)
LUCINDA WILLIAMS (80s, 1 of 3)
Ann: Lisa, out of respect to you, I haven't even started with the 80s yet. I'm going to select the great Lucinda Williams, one of the drawl time greats.
[To universal appreciation around draft table]
#3: Lisa (83)
RIHANNA (2000s, 1 of 2)
Lisa: The triumvirate of 2000s divas is now complete; Beyoncé, Taylor Swift, and now Rihanna. All is right with the world, go back to your homes and sleep tight.
#4: Greil (84)
BJÖRK (90s, 1 of 3)
Greil: If I had a swan outfit, I'd be wearing it right now.
[Silence]
#5: Quest (85)
OUTKAST (90s, 1 of 3)
Quest: First ballot HOFers! I appreciate everyone staying out of my way today! This has been walk in the park.
Greil: The diversity blitz continues.
#6: Eric (86)
GUNS 'N ROSES (90s, 1 of 3)
Eric: I pick Guns n Roses and I don't know why. I guess because they put Poison out of business?
#7: Lester (87)
MOTÖRHEAD (80s, 2 of 3)
Lester: Nobody has more team speed than Mr. Lester!
#8: Amanda (88)
NICK CAVE & THE BAD SEEDS (80s, 2 of 3)
Amanda: Early period demented Cave, mid-period demented Cave, and late period demented Cave, plus a string of contemplative late-career masterpieces.
Ira: Fuck. That's a great pick.
#9: Ira (89)
DE LA SOUL (80s, 3 of 3)
Ira: I close out the 80s with De La Soul, who released 3 Feet High & Rising in 1989, which makes them eligible for this spot under the Classic Album Act of 1974.
#10: Doug (90)
METALLICA (80s, 1 of 3)
Greil: Before you tell us your pick can I request you don't announce it like you're hosting the NFL Draft?
Doug: [Staring directly at Greil] With the 90th pick in the 2025 Pickled Priest Fantasy Music Draft, Doug selects Metallica.
PRIEST COMMENTARY
As more drafters scramble to complete the 80s and 90s, we see some inspired and less obvious choices come off the board, which makes this one of the more interesting rounds so far. We have quite the variety pack: Americana, experimental, punk, metal, hip-hop, pop, and Nick Cave, wherever he fits into all of this. We're also seeing some drafters tiring of the big names and picking some personal favorites.
Value Pick: Nick Cave at #88. An artist with a deep catalog that is still surprisingly at the peak of his popularity later in his career. Not common.
____________________
ROUND TEN
#10: Doug (91)
DIRE STRAITS (80s, 2 of 3)
Doug: [Still locked on Greil] With the 91st pick in the Pickled Priest Fantasy Music Draft, Doug selects Dire Straits.
#9: Ira (92)
PJ HARVEY (90s, 1 of 3)
Ira: Get ready for a steady diet of 90's rock, the best kind.
Lester: After 50s, 60's, 70's, and 80's rock, that would be next.
#8: Amanda (93)
LOS LOBOS (80s, 3 of 3)
Amanda: The wildly underappreciated and undervalued Los Lobos is my last pick for the 90s. An American institution for over 50 years now. Put them in the Rock & Roll HOF already.
Pickled Priest: Congratulations, you have closed out the 80s on your draft board.
#7: Lester (94)
GUIDED BY VOICES (80s, 3 of 3)
Lester: It's time for the King of Beers, Robert Pollard to get his just due and I'm here to give it to him.
#6: Eric (95)
BEASTIE BOYS (80s, 2 of 3)
Eric: You had me counted out, didn't you? Well, I'm back fighting for my right to party.
#5: Quest (96)
RUN-D.M.C. (80s, 3 of 3)
Quest: One of the OGs. I'm glad you invited me today or else this list would be one huge loaf of day-old white bread.
#4: Greil (97)
STEREOLAB (90s, 2 of 3)
Greil: I've decided to go rogue from now on. I have no desire to win and I cannot do so without jeopardizing my critical integrity. Hence, Stereolab is my next pick.
Amanda: Your Nobel Prize nomination form is in the mail.
#3: Lisa (98)
FIONA APPLE (90s, 2 of 3)
Lisa: Uncompromising, utterly singular talent. I go nowhere without her. An Apple a day...
#2: Ann (99)
ELLIOTT SMITH (90s, 3 of 3)
Ann: Perhaps the best songwriter of the 90s.
Pickled Priest: That closes out the 90s for you Jessica.
#1: Greg (100)
RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE (90s, 3 of 3)
Greg: 100 picks deep and it's now time to rage against something and what better to rage against than the machine?
Pickled Priest: That closes out your 90's board, sir.
PRIEST COMMENTARY
Another round that finds the group tuckpointing their 80s and 90s selections. Some real surprises for the first time, including Guided By Voices, Stereolab, and Los Lobos. All worthy, of course, but perhaps getting on with the 21st Century while it's open season would've been a better idea. These picks would've likely been available later, too. Could affect their final rankings.
Value Pick: Fiona Apple at #98. An enigmatic genius.
____________________
ROUND ELEVEN
#1: Greg (101)
THE CURE (80s, 3 of 3)
Greg: I consider this a good old-fashioned heist, 80's style. Did everyone forget about them?
Eric: No. No we didn't.
Pickled Priest: You're done with the 80s, too, Greg.
#2: Ann (102)
JASON ISBELL (2000s, 1 of 2)
Ann: With my 99th pick I get the best songwriter of the 90s; with my 102nd pick I get the best songwriter of the 2000's! It's all about the songs and always has been.
#3: Lisa (103)
TORI AMOS (90s, 3 of 3)
Lisa: Ann, you know I love you, but check out my last two picks and get back to me on the songwriter thing.
Pickled Priest: You're now done with the 90s.
#4: Greil (104)
PAVEMENT (90s, 3 of 3)
Greil: Even I'm amazed at how well Pavement has aged over the years. Who knew slacker rock would be timeless!
Greg: Mark it. Greil's first positive comment comes in Round 11.
Pickled Priest: 90s finished, Greil, and a new tray of jalapeno poppers is ready in the kitchen.
#5: Quest (105)
KENDRICK LAMAR (2000s, 1 of 2)
Quest: Someone has to acknowledge that rap music has dominated the 21st Century and Kendrick is the captain of the ship.
#6: Eric (106)
BLUR (90s, 2 of 3)
Eric: The Oasis vs Blur rivalry was never a real rivalry and we all know it.
#7: Lester (107)
VAMPIRE WEEKEND (2000s, 1 of 2)
Lester: Why is intelligence pretentious? Answer: It's not.
#8: Amanda (108)
SOCIAL DISTORTION (90s, 1 of 3)
Amanda: Walking the walk, talking the talk for over 40 years now.
#9: Ira (109)
SLEATER-KINNEY (90s, 2 of 3)
Ira: Never a bad album pre- and post-reunion. Consistency is an underrated virtue.
#10: Doug (110)
THE GO-GOS (80s, 3 of 3)
Doug: With the 110th pick in the 2025 Pickled Priest Fantasy Music Draft , Doug selects the Go-Gos, putting the pink in punk.
Pickled Priest: That puts your 80s on ice, Doug.
PRIEST COMMENTARY
Lots of Excel spreadsheets and Power Points were shuffled frantically during this round, ensuring that no stone was unturned. With a 2:00 pick time, scouring remaining decades only intensified. Preparation really showed during this round with some faring better than others.
Value Pick: Jason Isbell at #102. A wise selection of an artist whose legacy grows more by the year.
____________________
ROUND TWELVE
#10: Doug (111)
BLINK-182 (90s, 3 of 3)
Doug: With the 111th pick in the 2025 Pickled Priest Fantasy Music Draft, Doug selects, Blink-182. Do not
underestimate the power of pop-punk.
Pickled Priest: That shuts down the 90s for Doug.
#9: Ira (112)
MY BLOODY VALENTINE (90s, 3 of 3)
Ira: Their greatness goes beyond Loveless, so give them some fuzzy love.
Pickled Priest: Another 90s board is closed.
#8: Amanda (113)
MORPHINE (90s, 2 of 3)
Amanda: I'm slipping in a personal favorite and I don't care if it undermines my chance to win.
#7: Lester (114)
MIRANDA LAMBERT (2000s, 2 of 2)
Lester: Have we all forgotten that country music exists? Where the cowboy hats at y'all?
Pickled Priest: 2000s closed out.
#6: Eric (115)
SMASHING PUMPKINS (90s, 3 of 3)
Eric: I don't even like them, but they were ubiquitous in the 90s for a reason.
Pickled Priest: And your 90s picks are done.
#5: Quest (116)
WU-TANG CLAN (90s, 2 of 3)
Quest: I really need to start hanging around with some new people!
#4: Greil (117)
LCD SOUNDSYSTEM (2000s, 1 of 2)
Greil: Someone more annoying than me! Imagine that!
#3: Lisa (118)
ST. VINCENT (2000s, 2 of 2)
Lisa: A great songwriter, singer, guitarist, and live performer. The full package.
Pickled Priest: 2000s completed.
#2: Ann (119)
NEKO CASE (2000s, 2 of 2)
Ann: An enigma and a great singer all at once.
Pickled Priest: Lisa, and now Jessica, are done with the new millennium until the Wold Card round.
#1: Greg (120)
THE MONKEES (60s, 2 of 3)
Greg: What this draft needs is a fake band. No, not Spinal Tap. Instead, the greatest TV band of all-time, the Monkees! Now I've got the real Beatles and the Hollywood Beatles!
PRIEST COMMENTARY
As is to be expected, several reaches are featured in this late round mish-mash. Where else would you see such variety? Blink-182, Miranda, and LCD Soundsystem stand out as possible draft killers, but we'll have to wait to see how this shakes out. The winner will not get distracted by shiny objects.
Value Pick: The Monkees at #120. Especially with the Beatles in the same camp. Very meta!
____________________
ROUND THIRTEEN
#1: Greg (121)
SMOKEY ROBINSON & THE MIRACLES (60s, 3 of 3)
Greg: The lifeblood of Motown.
Pickled Priest: Greg finally completes the 60s. Only Doug and Lisa remain open for 60's biz.
#2: Ann (122)
JOHN MELLENCAMP (80s, 2 of 3)
Ann: If it is possible to be in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and still be underrated, John Mellencamp is the prime example.
#3: Lisa (123)
THE JACKSON 5 (60s, 2 of 3)
Lisa: They endcapped the 60s/70s, so they're good in either decade. The chart success doesn't lie. It's as easy as counting off small numbers.
Pickled Priest: Group, growing weary, doesn't even bother to call a vote on this one.
#4: Greil (124)
JOY DIVISION (70s, 3 of 3)
Greil: I pick Joy Division/New Order with my next selection.
Pickled Priest: By an 8-1 vote, Joy Division and New Order must be split into two selections.
Greil: You allowed it for Parliament/Funkadelic!
Pickled Priest: Circumstances are different. Ruling is final. You're officially done with the 70s now, like it or not.
#5: Quest (125)
ROXY MUSIC (70s, 3 of 3)
Quest: A little bone throw for the rest of the draft board, Roxy Music is my next pick.
Greg: Lo and behold! Streak broken!
Pickled Priest: Spread out over 13 picks, but the 70s are finally done for you.
#6: Eric (126)
NINE INCH NAILS (80s, 3 of 3)
Eric: Another era-defining band for me. Smear yourself with mud and jump into the mosh pit.
Pickled Priest: 80s out.
#7: Lester (127)
SUGAR (90s, 1 of 3)
Lester: A short, put potent, shelf-life, no other band brought the melodic electricity in quite the same way.
Amanda: Not sure they have enough material to be considered, but OK.
#8: Amanda (128)
THE JON SPENCER BLUES EXPLOSION (90s, 3 of 3)
Amanda: With respect Lester, the JSBX not only brought more electricity than Sugar, they had a theremin onstage to channel it into their nervous system.
Pickled Priest: Bye bye to your 90s.
#9: Ira (129)
BO DIDDLEY (50s, 1 of 1)
Ira: Bo Diddley by TKO in the 13rd Round! Every other person drafted within 12 rounds of him can bite me.
Pickled Priest: Only one more 50s artist left to be drafted.
#10: Doug (130)
THE RIGHTEOUS BROTHERS (60s, 2 of 3)
Doug: With the 130th pick in the 2025 Pickled Priest Fantasy Music Draft, Doug selects the Righteous Brothers. My 60s coterie is admittedly weak, but no other artist has a "You've Lost That Lovin' Feeling" in their arsenal either.
PRIEST COMMENTARY
Every eligible decade from the 50s to the 90s is present as the teams start closing out their strategic visions. A couple boutique items taken from the 90s, which is to be expected from an era where so many bands were signed in such a short time, which thins down the consensus options somewhat.
Value Pick: Lots of good choices, but nabbing rock pioneer Bo Diddley at #129 is notable. That said, the degree of difficulty of handling the 50s, with only one pick each, lessens the impact, especially when you're one of the last to pick. Still, it's Bo Diddley. Nuff said.
____________________
ROUND FOURTEEN
#10: Doug (131)
THE FACES/SMALL FACES (60s, 3 of 3)
Doug: With the 131sth pick in the 2025 Picked Priest Fantasy Music Draft, Doug selects the Faces, with a Small Faces sidecar. If this combo is good enough for Hall of Fame, they're good enough for me.
Pickled Priest: 60s issues now rectified.
Greil: I call for a vote! How is this allowed and my Joy Division/New Order selection wasn't! What's the protocol for filing a formal protest?
Pickled Priest: There is none.
#9: Ira (132)
ARCTIC MONKEYS (2000s, 1 of 2)
Ira: Not just the best British band of the 2000s, the best British band of the last 35 years. Better than Blur, better than Oasis, better than Radiohead, better than [insert favorite British band here].
Eric: Bold words. I suggest a vote on his assertion be conducted.
Pickled Priest: We don't call votes on assertions.
#8: Amanda (133)
TV ON THE RADIO (2000s, 1 of 2)
Amanda: They thrilled in the aughts and should never have split up.
#7: Lester (134)
ASS PONYS (90s, 2 of 3)
Lester: The precursor to Wussy, the Ass Ponys quietly put up some of the best alternative rock songwriting of the 90s.
#6: Eric (135)
JAPANDROIDS (2000s, 1 of 2)
Eric: Beloved Pickled Priest favorite and now one of mine!
Lisa: You must be a vacuum because you can really suck up.
#5: Quest (136)
RUN THE JEWELS (2000s, 2 of 2)
Quest: Tough talk for hard times. Just what the world needed.
Pickled Priest: That all, folks. For his 2000s at least.
#4: Greil (137)
NEW ORDER (80s, 3 of 3)
Greil: In protest, I also pick the back half of the Joy Division/New Order horse costume.
Prickly Priest: Quit your bitching and close out your 80's board.
#3: Lisa (138)
NINA SIMONE (60s, 3 of 3)
Lisa: I'm going to steal Miss Simone in the 14th Round!
Pickled Priest: The final 60s artist of the draft has been selected!
#2: Ann (139)
BLONDIE (70s, 3 of 3)
Ann: The girls are always right.
Pickled Priest: 70s now closed
#1: Greg (140)
JERRY LEE LEWIS (50s, 1 of 1)
Greg: I am proud to draft the Killers! No, check that, the Killer! Jerry Lee Motherfucking Lewis! Left on his own for 139 picks. That should be against the law!
Pickled Priest: And we now have our final 50s artist off the board. Decade closed for all!
PRIEST COMMENTARY
To clarify, the main reason I didn't allow Greil to pick Joy Division and New Order at the same time, despite his claims of hypocrisy on my part (due to the Parliament/Funkadelic and Faces/Small Faces decisions), was mainly to piss him off. I'm not proud of it, but he can be a huge pain in the ass sometimes as has been proven by his acerbic comments throughout the draft. I will compensate by considering this when assessing his draft performance and adjust accordingly. Make no mistake, however, it was worth it.
____________________
ROUND FIFTEEN
#1: Greg (141)
AMY WINEHOUSE (2000s, 2 of 2)
Greg: I am going to break everybody's heart by selecting the incomparable Amy Winehouse, lord rest her drunken soul.
Pickled Priest: 2000s board closed. And for the rest of this round I will cease announcing closed decades.
#2: Ann (142)
KATE BUSH (80s, 3 of 3)
Ann: The talent at the end of the draft normally wanes, but not today.
#3: Lisa (143)
JOURNEY (70s, 3 of 3)
Lisa: Affiliated with the 80s, yes, but don't start believin' their best songs weren't mostly recorded in the 1970s!
#4: Greil (144)
LORDE (2000s, 2 of 3)
Greil: Diversity play. I repeat diversity play.
Jessica: The Donald is going to come down hard on the Priest for implementing that rule! Expect your funding to be cut off.
Pickled Priest: What funding? Bring it on.
#5: Quest (145)
MESHELL NDEGEOCELLO (90s, 3 of 3)
Quest: What a career she's built. Very few artists have covered as much ground and succeeded on all of it!
#6: Eric (146)
THE SHINS (2000s, 2 of 2)
Eric: Accessible alternative rock is not a crime.
Lester: Accessible alternative is an oxymoron.
#7: Lester (147)
YO LA TENGO (90s, 3 of 3)
Lester: Why not Yo La Tengo?
Eric: Critic's pick, critic's pick, critic's pick!
#8: Amanda (148)
MACY GRAY (2000s, 2 of 2)
Amanda: Stoned and peculiar, yes, but a one of a kind artist who stands out even on a list of music legends.
#9: Ira (149)
LANA DEL REY (2000s, 2 of 2)
Ira: Her legacy is undecided, but I predict she'll be well regarded fifty years from now.
#10: Doug (150)
VAN HALEN (70s, 3 of 3)
Doug: With the 150th pick in the 2025 Pickled Priest Fantasy Music Draft, Doug selects Van Halen. Can I carve out only the David Lee Roth years?
Pickled Priest: No, you cannot.
Doug: Fuck it, I still pick Van Halen. Everything after 1984 can be used to balance a wobbly kitchen table.
Pickled Priest: Who would've imagined the last non-Wild Card selection would be from the 70s?
PRIEST COMMENTARY
I'm impressed with the late round picks I'm seeing here, although there is a whiff of desperation from some (Greil, to be specific). Once all the picks are assembled as a team we'll see how it all shakes out. Some smart strategizing used, which I will comment on in the draft recap later.
Value Pick: Van Halen at #150 (even with the wildly inferior Sammy Hagar years).
____________________
ROUND SIXTEEN (WILD CARDS)
Pickled Priest: We now start the "Wild Card" Round where one artist from any decade can be selected. This is the equivalent of the Flex in Fantasy Football, but saved for the very end.
#10: Doug (151)
THE DOOBIE BROTHERS
Doug: You expected anything else?
Greil: You waited until the final round to stop announcing your selections and referring to yourself in the third person?
Doug: [Evil grin]
#9: Ira (152)
BLACK SABBATH
Ira: On a list generally devoid of metal bands, I'll try to inject some doom and gloom into the proceedings at the 11th hour.
#8: Amanda (153)
KISS
Amanda: Based on the post content at Pickled Priest, I may be accused of pandering with this selection, but I assure you I am not (wink wink).
#7: Lester (154)
THE BEE GEES
Lester: A case could've be made for the 60s or the 70s, but since this is the Wild Card that doesn't matter anymore.
#6: Eric (155)
RUSH
Eric: A niche item, of course, with a 99% male fan base, but I have a penis, so I'm going there.
#5: Quest (156)
BAD BRAINS
Quest: Reggae idealism and punk fury all in one spot. Two, two, two bands in one!
#4: Greil (157)
KRAFTWERK
Greil: I'm giving some liebe to my fellow Germans, Kraftwerk. Is there a band in 2025 cited more often in critical record reviews? Their influence is eternal.
#3: Lisa (158)
FLEETWOOD MAC
Lisa: I don't know if this was an oversight or not, but the steal of the draft is about to be announced. How they got skipped over, especially by me, is mystifying. This may seal the deal for me as the PPFMD Champion for 2025...Fleetwood Mac!
Ann: Shocking!
#2: Ann (159)
TRACY CHAPMAN
Ann: I'm a songwriter's girl. I won't give my heart to anyone who can't write a great song. Hence, I choose the groundbreaking Tracy Chapman with my Wild Card pick.
Pickled Priest: Ladies and gentlemen, this is the final rose tonight.
#1: Greg (160)
BILLY JOEL
Greg: ...with the 160th and final selection of the 2025 Pickled Priest Fantasy Music Draft, Greg selects Mr. Irrelevant, Billy Joel, critics be damned to a fiery hell.
Doug: You stole my shtick!
Greil: Well, you did stop using it, so it was open season! [Simulates mic drop]
PRIEST COMMENTARY
After waiting for the Doobies to be picked by Doug for the entire draft it finally happened. I thought others might scoop the pick from Doug's team out of spite (Greil, looking at you). It's not surprising most of the picks were from the more established and fertile decades. With so many left on the cutting room floor, some tough decisions had to be made. And no, I don't discourage pandering mainly because I'm immune to it.
Value Pick: As noted, Fleetwood Mac at #158 was the draft's biggest oversight. I thought they'd go early on and they never came. Group dementia?
____________________
FINAL TEAM ROSTER & RANKING
10TH PLACE
Eric (Team 6)
50s: Buddy Holly (Round 4)
60s: The Doors (Round 5)
60s: Janis Joplin (Round 6)
60s: The Stooges (Round 7)
70s: Led Zeppelin (Round 1)
70s: Pink Floyd (Round 2)
70s: Elton John (Round 3)
80s: Guns 'n Roses (Round 9)
80s: Beastie Boys (Round 10)
80s: Nine Inch Nails (Round 13)
90s: Tupac Shakur (Round 8)
90s: Blur (Round 11)
90s: Smashing Pumpkins (Round 12)
2000s: Japandroids (Round 14)
2000s: The Shins (Round 15)
WC: Rush (Round 16)
PRIEST COMMENTARY
Eric was the darkhorse of the whole draft and it showed. He was a last-second replacement and his lack of preparation and inferior knowledge showed in selections which seemed phoned in from a friend peeking through the draft room window. Sorry, Eric, but I must call it as I see it. I simply don't believe these are all your picks. His 70s selections are by far his team's foundation. An imposing power trio to say the least. And Rush in the Wild Card round is an inspired choice. Overall, however, too many dubious choices made often at the wrong time.
____________________
9TH PLACE
Doug (Team 10)
50s: Elvis Presley (Round 1)
60s: Simon & Garfunkel (Round 5)
60s: The Righteous Brothers (Round 13)
60s: The Faces/Small Faces (Round 14)
70s: Joni Mitchell (Round 3)
70s: Sly & the Family Stone (Round 6)
70s: Van Halen (Round 15)
80s: Metallica (Round 9)
80s: Dire Straits (Round 10)
80s: The Go-Gos (Round 11)
90s: Nirvana (Round 2)
90s: Oasis (Round 6)
90s: Blink-182 (Round 12)
2000s: Taylor Swift (Round 4)
2000s: The White Stripes (Round 5)
WC: The Doobie Brothers (Round 16)
PRIEST COMMENTARY
If you can call a decade weak when all of the artists are Rock and Roll Hall of Famers, Doug's 1960s might be it. Keep in mind, only thirty 60's artists were on the board maximum (prior to the Wild Card round). He likely waited a bit too long to pull the trigger for his picks. His 70's choices are all strong, as with everyone just about, so it's not shocking he did OK there. There's something missing in the 80s, too. Maybe it's the overrated Metallica catalog and the shorter shelf-life of the Go-Gos. He did get Nirvana in the 90s, which brings up his average significantly, but Oasis and Blink are fan favorites more than anything. I'm pleased he got the Doobies in the end (his birthright), but they shouldn't have been a part of this draft at all and he knows it. So, in the end, the guy who drafted Elvis Presley & Taylor Swift gets 9th place. A cruel world, this is.
____________________
8TH PLACE
Greil (Team 4)
Â
50s: Chuck Berry (Round 4)
60s: Creedence Clearwater Revival (Round 5)
60s: The Band (Round 6)
60s: Leonard Cohen (Round 7)
70s: Neil Young (Round 2)
70s: Bob Marley (Round 3)
70s: Joy Division (Round 13)
80s: Prince (Round 1)
80s: The Smiths (Round 8)
80s: New Order (Round 14)
90s: Björk (Round 9)
90s: Stereolab (Round 10)
90s: Pavement (Round 11)
2000s: LCD Soundsystem (Round 12)
2000s: Lorde (Round 15)
WC: Kraftwerk (Round 16)
PRIEST COMMENTARY
He's primarily a 60's guy, so the shock of the draft was him taking Prince in Round #1. I appreciate his out of the box strategy. Oddly, his 60s picks are only pretty good (again, compared to his competitors) as a result. He did well getting Neil, Bob, Björk, and the Smiths, his knowledge of all decades shining clearly. I'm lukewarm on his 00's picks, however. A real miss on his part. And his announcement that he was abandoning the intent of the draft didn't sit well with the Priest, impacting his final ranking. You knew the rules.
____________________
7TH PLACE
Lester (Team 7)
Â
50s: The Everly Brothers (Round 5)
60s: The Velvet Underground (Round 1)
60s: The Grateful Dead (Round 4)
60s: The Byrds (Round 6)
70s: Bruce Springsteen (Round 2)
70s: The Ramones (Round 3)
70s: ABBA (Round 7)
80s: Hüsker Dü (Round 8)
80s: Motörhead (Round 9)
80s: Guided By Voices (Round 10)
90s: Sugar (Round 13)
90s: Ass Ponys (Round 14)
90s: Yo La Tengo (Round 15)
2000s: Vampire Weekend (Round 11)
2000s: Miranda Lambert (Round 12)
WC: The Bee Gees (Round 16)
PRIEST COMMENTARY
Did VU have to be taken in round one? Discuss. With a middling 60s group, his 70s and 80s really turned up the heat on the others, a real variety pack to say the least, which is a good quality and diversity. This is a team where can you find Hüsker Dü, Motörhead, and ABBA hanging out together. A wild dinner party. A fine assortment of alt-rock heroes are included as well. GBV particularly inspired. Sugar has a relatively light catalog for a 90s pick, however. The less said about his 2000s picks the better. Rough. Adding serious 60s and 70s depth with the Bee Gees was genius.
____________________
6TH PLACE
Greg (Team 1)
50s: Jerry Lee Lewis (Round 14)
60s: The Beatles (Round 1)
60s: The Monkees (Round 12)
60s: Smokey Robinson & The Miracles (Round 13)
70s: Queen (Round 2)
70s: The Clash (Round 3)
70s: AC/DC (Round 4)
80s: U2 (Round 5)
80s: Iron Maiden (Round 6)
80s: The Cure (Round 11)
90s: Pearl Jam (Round 8)
90s: Green Day (Round 9)
90s: Rage Against the Machine (Round 10)
2000s: Beyoncé (Round 7)
2000s: Amy Winehouse (Round 15)
WC: Billy Joel (Round 16)
PRIEST COMMENTARY
Waited too long to get prime picks from the 60s, but having the Beatles in his stable does make up for some of that. 70s is rock solid. 80s shows a little weakness, however, but Greg rebounded in the 90s and 2000s. Billy Joel pickup in last round also boosts his team's stock.
____________________
5TH PLACE
Lisa (Team 3)
50s: Little Richard (Round 5)
60s: The Rolling Stones (Round 1)
60s: The Jackson 5 (Round 13)
60s: Nina Simone (Round 14)
70s: David Bowie (Round 2)
70s: Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers (Round 4)
70s: Journey (Round 15)
80s: Madonna (Round 3)
80s: The Pretenders (Round 6)
80s: The Police (Round 7)
90s: Eminem (Round 8)
90s: Fiona Apple (Round 10)
90s: Tori Amos (Round 11)
21st: Rihanna (Round 9)
21st: St. Vincent (Round 12)
WC: Fleetwood Mac (Round 16)
PRIEST COMMENTARY
Sure, having the Stones helps, but deferring her 60s picks to rounds 13 and 14 hurt Lisa significantly compared to her cohorts. Most picks in the draft are worthy, that's not the point, but you need to understand where to time travel and when. Her main milieu is the 80s, so it's no surprise she did well there. I like her 90s/00s picks, too, but perhaps she was a bit gender-biased in her selection methodology.
____________________
4TH PLACE
Quest (Team 5)Â
50s: Fats Domino (Round 5)
60s: James Brown (Round 3)
60s: Marvin Gaye (Round 4)
60s: The Temptations (Round 7)
70s: Stevie Wonder (Round 1)
70s: Parliament/Funkadelic (Round 6)
70s: Roxy Music (Round 12)
80s: Michael Jackson (Round 2)
80s: Public Enemy (Round 8)
80s: Run-D.M.C. (Round 10)
90s: Outkast (Round 9)
90s: Wu-Tang Clan (Round 12)
90s: Meshell Ndegeocello (Round 15)
2000s: Kendrick Lamar (Round 11)
2000s: Run the Jewels (Round 14)
WC: Bad Brains (Round 16)
PRIEST COMMENTARY
I knew going in that we were light on hip-hop and rap fans, so that left the door open for Quest to snag many of the major players, but as others noted, he leaned too far into his personal preferences and stacked the deck with a dream lineup which does lack in diversity, a stated judging criteria. And throwing a bone with Roxy Music, quality notwithstanding, was an obvious last ditch attempt to rectify matters. Too little too late. As a collection of groundbreaking artists, however, his team is nothing short of awesome. Hence, his high ranking.
____________________
3RD PLACE
Ann (Team 2)
50s: Johnny Cash (Round 2)
60s: Bob Dylan (Round 1)
60s: Sam Cooke (Round 3) [Allowed after group vote: 5-4]
60s: Diana Ross & The Supremes (Round 6)
70s: Van Morrison (Round 4)
70s: Lynyrd Skynyrd (Round 7)
70s: Blondie (Round 14)
80s: Lucinda Williams (Round 9)
80s: John Mellencamp (Round 13)
80s: Kate Bush (Round 15)
90s: Radiohead (Round 5)
90s: Beck (Round 8)
90s: Elliott Smith (Round 10)
2000s: Jason Isbell (Round 11)
2000s: Neko Case (Round 12)
WC: Tracy Chapman (Round 16)
PRIEST COMMENTARY
Inarguably a strong group of songwriters, that approach did sacrifice some genre diversity, not to mention a diminished ability to bring some rock & roll when needed. Only Skynyrd helps on that front. Individual choices are all excellent, but we wanted even more. Having Bob Dylan as team captain is a major plus, but good luck getting him to fulfill those duties. One of the few drafters to go country, Johnny Cash is a brilliant Round 2 choice and snagging Sam Cooke in Round 3 was a major coup as well. Then, the Supremes and Van Morrison back-to-back was very impressive. Strengths overall made the weaknesses less of an issue. Well done. Bronze medal.
____________________
2ND PLACE
Amanda (Team 8)Â
50s: Ray Charles (Round 3)
60s: The Who (Round 1)
60s: Otis Redding (Round 2)
60s: The Kinks (Round 4)
70s: Randy Newman (Round 5)
70s: Al Green (Round 6)
70s: Bob Seger & the Silver Bullet Band (Round 7)
80s: The Replacements (Round 8)
80s: Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds (Round 9)
80s: Los Lobos (Round 10)
90s: Social Distortion (Round 11)
90s: Morphine (Round 12)
90s: Jon Spencer Blues Explosion (Round 13)
2000s: TV on the Radio (Round 14)
2000s: Macy Gray (Round 15)
WC: Kiss (Round 16)
PRIEST COMMENTARY
Impressive variety and an absolutely killer 1,2,3,4 start, accomplishing everything the draft rewards. Strong in the 80s, but she went a lot more personal in the 90s, an approach admittedly hard to resist. Kiss was an obvious kiss-ass move, but at least it was in the Wild Card round. She may have sacrificed a great selection more to her liking in the process. Still, looking around this draft board is a major pleasure for me because it is the most closely aligned with my own personal tastes, which makes being objective difficult. But I was, her selections just kick ass front-to-back. A savvy strategist. Silver medal.
____________________
1ST PLACE
Ira (Team 9)Â
50s: Bo Diddley (Round 13)
60s: Jimi Hendrix Experience (Round 1)
60s: Aretha Franklin (Round 2)
60s: The Beach Boys (Round 4)
70s: Talking Heads (Round 5)
70s: Patti Smith (Round 6)
70s: Elvis Costello (Round 7)
80s: R.E.M. (Round 3)
80s: Pixies (Round 8)
80s: De La Soul (Round 9)
90s: PJ Harvey (Round 10)
90s: Sleater-Kinney (Round 11)
90s: My Bloody Valentine (Round 12)
2000s: Arctic Monkeys (Round 14)
2000s: Lana Del Rey (Round 15)
WC: Black Sabbath (Round 16)
PRIEST COMMENTARY
A very impressive performance out of the nine-spot. The diversity of the Hendrix-Aretha-Beach Boys 60s trio was well orchestrated; guitar, vocals, harmonies, a little of everything. The 70s is a little late-70s focused, but super solid with a nice edge to it. I would've found one early decade choice in place of Elvis Costello, but that's a quibble. The 80s pulls off everything this draft is about, though. The 90s follows suit. Arctic Monkeys in Round 14 was a brilliant choice and going Sabbath with the last pick shows an awareness of weaknesses and attempts to address them. The best draft of the night as a result. Congrats to Ira for winning our inaugural event!
____________________
Next time: The same Fantasy Draft, but with a shocking twist. Feel free to submit your personal rankings.
Cheers,
The Priest